Johan Riley Fyodor Taiwo Samuel Klum Seal . . . You're Out!

. . . of your mother, Supermodel and Host Heidi Klum!

Yes, the guy with the swoonworthy croon and the lady who welcomes you to the Runway have produced yet another genetically superior addition to the human race. Their first child, Henry, is already filming a reality series, taking acting and voice lessons and working on a first album and novel. His first step was, according to sources, "fierce."

Commenting on the birth, jet set American designer Michael Kors said, "Oh my god, it was like her vagina exploded all down the front of her dress! What that wasn't a dress?"

Nina Garcia, fashion director of Elle magazine, said, "You know, Heidi really disappointed me. A birth is supposed to be heartwarming and that's not what I saw on the runway today."

Guest judge Katie Holmes said, "At least she got to f*ckin scream!"