It Was All STAGED!

As some of you know, one of the Fag 5 also does some writing not in a gay blog or gay magazine. And it just so happens that a scene from one of his works in development is being performed in a little staged reading as part of a one-night-only event called "Freshly Squeezed: A Celebration of Juicy New Works."

Now, he has not seen any of the other scenes being read nor has he been to a rehearsal of the scene of his that's being read; so he can make little to no guarantees about the quality of the work, but he wanted to let all of you know you're welcome if you want to come. Here's the info:

Freshly Squeezed: A Celebration of Juicy New Works
Host: Hosted by Sasha Taublieb
Location: Theatre for the New City
155 First Avenue, New York, NY View Map
When: Sunday, March 12, 7:00pm
Phone: (212) 254-1109
This Freshly Squeezed Reading will feature work by playwrights Paul Hagen, George Hunka, Michael Roderick, Mac Rogers, John Schoneboom, Sasha Taublieb and Alex Weider.
It will also feature some damn talented thespians: Jennifer Moses, Synge Maher, Lilly Hartley, Alana Jackler, Hannah Wolfe, David Ian Lee, Greg Oliver Bodine, Helene Galek, Lynda Berge, Adam Devine, Alex Weider, Tiffany Clementi and Frank Mihelich.
It's free!
www.wildchildpresents.com

Jake's Eyes Are Worth A Thousand Words

Literally!

I have reason to believe that the most popular online forum, happens to lie right here, and its subject: Jake Gyllenhaal's eyelashes!

Why, you ask?

Well, it could be the 533 pages of text discussing the eyelashes, or maybe the 100,000 page views.

Click above to read all about the crazy fags and their obsessions (I wouldn't know anything about obsessions at all on the other hand, by the way, Daniel V, if you are reading this, shoot us a comment!).

Everybody's Doing It #1

Kittens, I know how many of you have peer pressure to thank for getting you on Friendster and eventually hauling ass over to Myspace; so I think it's only fair to introduce you to the latest time-sucking indulgence peer pressure has introduced into my life.

It's called the Hollywood Stock Exchange. Buy and Sell stock in your favorite (or not so favorite) celebs and watch it rise. You could have an Angelina Jolie's lips size payday if Scarlett Jo has a good opening weekend or Phillip Seymour Ho wins another award.

Imagine the uproar if Brangelina's next movie is a flop! It will be like the tech bubble bursting all over again.

And don't you want Brangelina's bubble to burst all over your FACE?

Go to www.hsx.com or just click here! Three Fag Cheers (Hip-Hip-Who-GAY!) to my dear friend Melody who turned me onto this insanity!

Who Will Croak First?: #1

Which aging rocker is on his way to death sooner?

Mr. Keith Richards or Mr. Eddie Van Halen (yes, can you believe that's really him!)

Put guesses in comments.

I *Heart* Mandisa!

That's about it.

She's fagulous!

I'm pullin' for her and her pearly whites.

Disappointing TV Poll

What was the biggest crusher for you this week?

a) Brokeback Mountain losing to Crash at the Oscars
b) The fat guy (hey, I don't watch the show!) dying from 24
c) Chloe beating out Daniel and Santino on Project Runway
d) Hearing Ace from American Idol choose another wussy song (have some balls, man!)
e) Finding out that the Bachelor dumped his ladyfriend months before the finale even aired.

VOTE VOTE VOTE!
(IN THE COMMENTS, OF COURSE)

Guess the HOTTIE

Hey Kids...It's 3:15...time to play GUESS THE HOTTIE...

Here's a hint: He's a dirty pop star...

Answer at 4:00...HURRY

Mariah Spotting in the East Village

OMG people...I just saw my girl Mariah Scary. She gave up her duplex TriBeCa penthouse and moved into a 5 story walk up in the East Village...Looks like Madame Butterfly is really taking in the culture of the area.

Do you BELIEVE??

I gotta give my girl Cher some props...In the land of plastic surgery, Botox and what have you, she insists on keeping things all natural...Let's here it for the crypt keeper herself...CHER =)

American Drag Idol?

Am I the only person who thinks that Mariah Carey looks like a cross between a drag queen and Paula Abdul in this photo?

No comment on the pink jacket, I'll bite my tongue... hard.

Mummy Dearest Rage (As Predicted) Towards Project Runway's Finale!

First off, last's night's supreme disappointment could have possibly been more enjoyable, had we played the Project Runway Drinking Game while sulking.

Ok, now on to the show.

While I did enjoy SOME pieces of Chloe's collection, overall, it did indeed look like a couch attack. Particularly that opening piece.. that pink thing, what the hell was that? Your thoughts?

Personally I LOVED Daniel's white top with the shimmer-y outline and Santino's gorgeous red dress, so hot!

Rather than expressing any further anger or melancholy, I'm going to take Santino's suggestion and turn my frown upside down, for maybe Daniel will resurface sometime soon. Hey, his web site is almost complete!

And if I bump into Mr. V on the street I'll be sure to show him some love!

Not like that, you fags!

Ok, maybe like that.

Project What the Fag?

Can you pick the winner of project runway out of this little picture? Please, take your time. I'll wait. I know. It can be difficult.

And speaking of difficult, LADIES? What the fag was up with the finale of Project Runway? Santino's lovely, tasteful collection that officially put him in the realm of the sane and the sleek, all american beauty of le collection du Daniel V. (who I will not mourn here because darling Mathilda will, I'm sure be presenting rage worthy of mummy dearest right here on this very blog) were up against Chloe's collection which, and Santino said it first and best bitches...

LOOKED LIKE A COUCH COMIN' AT YA!

Well, I've respected Chloe's work all season, and I think she's a lovely person and deserves all the success in the world, but I must respectfully disagree with the decision of this year's project runway.

AND I MEAN COME ON. PROJECT CHLOE? T'AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN!

Mathilda, I hope for your sake that the job that M. Kors offered the V. at the end of the show was of the design and not the blow variety.

But all is not lost, for (like the moon replacing the sun) as we bid goodbye to project runway, we wave hello to Miss Jay, Mister Jay, Twiggy, dishy Nigel Barker, a baker's dozen (ironically - cuz you know the bitches don't eat) of would-be models and one big 'ol gorgeous pile of hair, teeth and titties Miss Tyra Banks for America's Next Top Model.

If Reality TV was crack, I'd be Whitney, y'all.

Daniel V Obsession Continues

HIS FRIENDSTER PROFILE IS YOURS TO VIEW BY CLICKING THIS LINK!!!

While you're there tell him how much you love Coldplay, To Kill A Mockingbird and his pretty pretty face.

Project Runway FINALE TONIGHT!!

AHH!

I can barely control myself.

While I'm the hugest Daniel V fan you will ever meet, (thank me later for this shirtless photo of him i dug up from last week's episode), I must say that after sneak peeking at the final collection I will be in shock if Santino doesn't win it all. Ginger Snaps is right on!

In fact, I'm confident posting these %s which I think hold true to tonight's victor.

Anybody out there rooting for Chloe?

Santino's chance of winning = 70%
Daniel's chance of winning = 25%
Chloe's chance of winning = 5%

Stick It.....

I think this might be the movie I've been most excited about for quite some time. X-Men III does look like it will be amazing but whatever happened to our crappy teenybopper movies that we can watch over and over. My Bring It On and Center Stage DVD are getting pretty scratched up. Well I think next month our prayers will be answered. The movie is titled "Stick It". The story is about a wild girl who imports the idea of rebellion into the regimented world of women's competitive gymnastics. Can we say best movie ever....um well probably not. But here it is.

Stick It

ladies and gentleman...i give you heaven on youtube

thank you to the random fag blogs i look at on this here internet, i ran across this little slice of heaven. fans of madonna and fans of jake beware...this slide show has been know to cream onlooker's panties. here it is...jake/forbidden love

Guess The Bitches #4

Before I begin, the answer to yesterday's post was PAM ANDERSON! (yes, again)

Here are 3 more, go!

Put guesses in comments.

Guess The Bitch #3

Try this on for size!

Guess The Bitch #2: Answer

It's good ol' Pammy!!

Next time will be more difficult, we promise.

Guess The Bitch #2

Ok, more like guess the breasts.

I think this one is relatively easy but let's see how you guys do.

Answer in a couple of hours.

Thousand Visitors!

Fagulous thanks you, all thousand of you who have visited our site.

Granted, 974 clicks were from the Fag Four (err, Five) ourselves... so this is more of a pat on the back.

We feel old already!!

Jake G Can't Stop The Rock!

and really why should he anyway?

Fashion Nightmare #1

Please tell me she's joking!

Although I will say that this is a slight improvement from the rags, venti Starbucks and oversized pearls she is usually sporting...

M's Oscar Review: 'Crash' Can Suck It!

Ok, I know I wasn't the only fag disappointed that Brokeback didn't win the coveted Best Picture Oscar.

However, it will be OK. I mean, we did get 3 biggies, including Best Director, Best Score and Best Adapted Screenplay! A round of applause for all involved with the legendary film.

Onto the good stuff now, THE OUTFITS!

Sadly I can't bitch about the worst dressed actors/actresses because nothing comes immediately to mind. In past years this has been far too simple (Gwyneth in that ill-fitting black lace dress; Joan Rivers deemed her boobs as 'chicken cutlets' in it...you remember it I'm sure), but not this one.

So, moving on, my pick for best dressed goes to...

Charlize Theron. Not the hugest fan of the massive bow but she really looked stunning in the satin-y Dior and how can you not love her? Charlize, congrats.

I also gotta say that Selma Hayek looked flawless. The woman is beautiful so I really didn't have any doubts but that blue was totally striking and hot on her.

Jennifer Aniston, Fagulous hearts you as well. So simple, so elegant, so classy. Please stay that way.

In individual award news, we were happy to hear that Phillip Seymour Hoffman won (although we were of course pulling for Heath) and even though I haven't seen Walk The Line yet, kudos to Reese, we knew it was your time to shine, girl!

we'll be queer for you...

because you're queer for us too...
can you guess the faggiest store in manhattan?
no matter what time of day, day of the week,
month of the year half of this store will be filled
with priscillas. although you might not be able to tell,
joan rivers of all people is standing in front of it in this picture.

the answer is here

so if you're broke and can't afford to go out to meet bitchy fags, just head here. all of your wildest dreams will come true